Sucker

Now that the school year is over for Mooter we, as her parents, are faced with the excruciating task of sorting through each and every scrap of paper she’s ever brought home from school. Art projects. Assignments (good and bad). Homework. Doodles. To a pack rat, sorting is an impossible task especially if things will be eliminated. The trash is not a friend of the pack rat… even though you think it would be, what, with the word “rat” in the name. But every Summer, I get the weeping and wailing of Mom, that’s my favorite. Mom, I love that little corner of paper. Mom, please don’t throw that away. Mom, I love that one. And, my personal favorite, I MADE THAT ONE FOR YOU! Because nothing says victory like guilting your mother into keeping clutter you made for her. And, yes, that sparkly, hard, crusted over pile of molded gloop is yours and you’d better wear it because it’s the prettiest broach you’ve ever seen. Even though you didn’t know that was a broach, you’d better know it now.

In pilfering through the debris, I find not only things that were supposedly made for me, but things I got suckered into making myself on behalf of a project. If your child ever comes home and tells you she has a school project…

…do me a favor…

Don’t let them fool you with their “I don’t know what the project should look like, my hands are too small, they’re going to get all sticky, you do it so much better than me” excuse.


You will end up doing the project. Trust me.

Thank God for Summer sorting.